Doug vs. the interweb

Forum - RECIPES FOR GENTLEMEN ^UP
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Michael - February 17th, 2009, 4:04:13 PM

4 8 people?? what are you trying to do, confuse me? Also, exactly how much is a dash?

Rob3rt - February 17th, 2009, 7:31:49 PM

Measure in pinches, not dashes! But what if my thumb and forefinger are bigger? Then my pinch is bigger than yours!

OUCH

Doug - February 17th, 2009, 9:17:15 PM

I've always enjoyed your larger pinches.

Michael - February 18th, 2009, 2:38:07 AM

Sorry I've been such a cranky butt. Seems I was stressed from testing out your recipe. Despite the success of its flavor, it was unfortunately once again a unsuitable quantity. I'll just need to double the dosage, I suppose. Cheerio!

Margot - May 15th, 2009, 2:32:14 AM

FURTHERMORE.


ಠ_ಠ

Doug - September 8th, 2009, 12:57:19 AM

There's only been two recipes posted so far. LAME. Here's another, and I'm copying it from a book actually, but this is the internet woooooooo. Actually, I'll be rewriting it in my own style and such anyway, so here goes!:

Mulligatawny Soup

For those blustery eve'ns in your humble abode, where you knobbly bits are so cold you haven't felt the blood flow through them in weeks. HERE AT LAST, a soup to restore your precious humours and invigorate the aether of life! Plus it tastes dang good.

1 oz butter
1 lb chicken (could be thigh cutlets, but we used breasts and it was grand). Start off with the whole breasts -- you won't be dicing it up until it's been cooking in the soup for about an hour.
1 large onion. Probably go with a sweet onion, as it's a slightly sweet soup.
1 apple, peeled, cored, and diced. Dice it well, unless you like apple chunks floating about. Any kind of apple really.
1 tb curry paste. I used green curry paste, which seems more appropriate than yellow or red. Could probably use powder, but I wouldn't recommend it!
2 tb flour
3 cups chicken stock. I actually made my own, which was bangin' for a first time stock, but anything really.
3 tb basmati rice. Or really, just something long grain. As long as you can get it!
1 tb chutney. I used apricot. You could use whatever. Spicy chutneys could work too; my soup came out spicy somehow anyway, and it was good.
1 tb lemon juice. So, one lemon, but add it to taste.
3 tb heavy or whipping cream.

alright so here you go:
1. Heat the butter in a large heavy-based saucepan (I'd say, a big soup pot of some sort) and brown the whole chicken breasts for 5 minutes (medium-high to high heat, but make sure it's not enough to be burning things), then remove from pan (it's ok if it's not done cooking, you'll be leaving it in the soup to finish). This may leave brownings and chicken bits in the pan, but that is SUPER ALRIGHT and adds flavor. Add the onion, apple, and curry paste to the pan. Cook for 5 minutes, or until it's all soft. Stir in the flour, cook for 2 minutes, then add half the stock. Stir until the mixture boils and thickens. It goes without saying, but stir the dang thing during all these steps.

2. Return the chicken to the pan with the remaining stock. Stir until boiling, reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer for 45 minutes. Finishes cooking the chicken, and commingles all the stuff. Then, add the rice and cook for 15 minutes longer.

3. Remove the chicken, and dice it up real good like. Return it back to the pot. Add the chutney, lemon juice, cream, and salt and pepper to taste. I went with about twice the recommended chutney, and extra cream and pepper.

4. DELICIOUS




As a side note, this was enough to satisfy Margot and I for one dinner, with a tiny bit left over, not even enough for a decent lunch the next day. I recommend doubling the recipe! Soup is best when there's lots left over!

D_M - December 20th, 2009, 11:24:04 PM

Recipe for a Man:

2 oz Jack Daniel's Tennessee whiskey
10 oz Coca-Cola

Pour jack daniels into large glass filled with ice. Pour coca-cola into the glass. Stir lightly.

Christine - December 21st, 2009, 1:18:30 AM

Ha ha. That is nothing compared to my dad's Irish Liquor!

Doug - January 11th, 2010, 11:34:01 PM

Chicken Tequila

Originally a recipe Margot got from a restaurant, she and I have long lost the original in favor of a more free-form, throw stuff in the pan sort of thing. So, I will try to reconstruct it how I can, but in the end, a lot of it will need to be adjusted as you go. It's pretty much safe to overcompensate on a lot of things; for example, too much wine or tequila is ok, as you'll be reducing it. Too many jalapenos, and just simmer at the end longer to mellow out the spiciness. Too much cream, and.. no problem at all! And even if you undercompensate on the chicken to save money, it's still filling and delicious, as long as you don't skimp on the pasta! And make sure you get fresh cilantro, as it brings everything all together at the end.

I'd say this serves about four people. For more, just scale everything, though a cheaper scaling solution is to just scale the liquids and seasonings.

- 1/2 cup tequila
- 1 cup white cooking wine
- 1 pint heavy cream

- 1 lb Chicken breasts, chopped into small bits.
- 10 jalapenos, seeded and diced. Could use more or less, but don't worry about it being too spicy, as the spiciness mellows a lot as it cooks. I like to be very generous with the jalapenos.
- 2 medium white onions, diced. Could use other kinds, but white is what we usually use.
- several cloves garlic, mashed or pressed
- 3 limes, juiced, and perhaps a little zest
- Fresh cilantro bunch
- salt and pepper
- about 1 TB sugar
- Pasta of some sort (penne works well) -- enough for however many people you've got.

- You'll need to prepare all the vegetables first; otherwise, things will get hectic. Chop up the onions, garlic, and jalapenos. I recommend wearing some kind of gloves for the jalapenos, since you'll be working with a lot of them, and their oils will just compound and you'll have spicy, burning hands for potentially several days. To de-seed the jalapenos, cut off their tops, cut them lengthwise, and scrape out their seeds with a spoon.

- In some kind of frying pan (cast iron if you have it), fry up the chicken with some oil on medium-high heat, until browned all over. It's not necessary to be sure they're 100% cooked through, as they'll be heated in the sauce a bit later as well. You could even have dredged the chicken bits in flour and salt before adding them to the frying pan, but that's optional.

- Meanwhile, in a large, tall pot on medium-high heat, throw in some oil and sautee up the onions, garlic, and jalapenos. When they start to get soft after a few minutes, add in the tequila, white cooking wine, and juice of two of the limes. Stirring often, let this reduce a bit, until it starts to look kind of thick. This can sometimes take a while, especially if you increase the proportions.

- Now that the wine and tequila are reduced, turn the heat down to medium and add the heavy cream. You may not need all of it -- this is one area where I'm not 100% sure of amounts. Of course, it won't hurt too badly to add too much. Now, simmer this with the cream, but don't let it boil (so turn it down if it starts to bump!). Add the chicken from the other pan. Now, an optional move here would be to have reserved some raw diced jalapeno to add at this step, as it would have preserved more of its flavor and texture by being added later. This would probably make it slightly spicier as well.

- If the sauce seems too thin.. don't worry, you'll be filling it all up with pasta. But if you're concerned, you could wisk in small amounts of flour or cornstarch, but you'd have to be sure to keep it from clumping, which is hard with a hot liquid. Better to just leave it as it is, maybe just simmer a bit longer. You're not covering it at any point, so evaporation will help it thicken slightly.

- Now, the last second seasonings. Add the cilantro. Fresh herbs lose their flavor quickly when cooked, so this can be put off until the very end, very shortly before serving. But make sure to stir and nicely integrate it all first. Taste it, and add salt and pepper as needed. If it needs more lime, add some more juice. You could even finely grate the lime skin to add some lime zest. Add the tablespoon of sugar to accent the lime. You may need slightly more -- again, this step is all to taste.

- Now add some cooked pasta into there! You could spoon the sauce onto the pasta, but I like mixing it all together.

Person who should be working - February 8th, 2010, 1:31:42 PM

This is a recipe for disaster:

1 Large Watermelon
1-2 gallons of Milk (enough to fill the watermelon)
A Trebuchet
A Large vat of lemonaid

Hollow watermelon, leaving only the green skin. Fill Watermelon with milk and aim at large vat of lemonaid. Fire trebuchet, taking care to be sure the watermelon bursts upon impact. If not, hack it to pieces. Serve chilled at a party, and have everyone drink until their bladders need to displace liquid. ENJOY!
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